We explore how individuals develop their own unique patterns of social behaviour, what determines their social motivations, and how different social identities are formed, maintained, and changed. We combine insight from genetics and behavioural studies with analysis of contemporary (social media) and historical datasets, to understand how personal and political identities evolve. Through behavioural experiments paired with augmented reality technologies, we test the effects of cognitive patterns and differences in interaction (e.g. vocabulary, non-verbal behaviours, personal appearance, accent) on outcomes such as escalation / de-escalation, and agreement or disagreement and well-being across the ages.